Hey folks, Harry here... It is nice to see a review come in from one of those test screenings that POOLHALL JUNKIES is getting on its way to being picked up for release... There is simply no way a movie this good slips through the cracks... Also, I'm glad to see that the xXx reviews have been favorable thus far, I've been looking forward to that one. And BLUE CRUSH sucking was a shocker. I mean, when I look at that trailer all I can think is... dude. And ya know, that's profound. I mean, like, all I need are some tasty waves, a cool buzz, and I'm fine. Right? But nooooOOOoooo... Well, here's the news from the Brewster...
Hey Harry & friends – after several days of contemplating whether or not to “spill the beans” on a few new films, I finally decided they needed to be spilled…after all that’s the reason I read your site everyday…I WANT ALL THE BEANS I CAN GET!
I recently had the pleasure of seeing xXx, Blue Crush, and Pool Hall Junkies. And as Meatloaf once sang (and somewhere in Reno probably still does) 2 out 3 ain’t bad.
First off let me say this -
1) I HATE spoilers. Why anyone would want to have the suspense of a story ruined for them before experiencing it first hand is beyond me. If a film has twists and turns then enjoy them for what they are…TWISTS AND TURNS! What’s the fun in hearing a joke if you already know the punch line?
2) There’s nothing worse than a preview that gives you every detail of the story. When I see a preview for a film I want to be left wanting more…not feeling like I already know the whole damn story.
That being said these reviews will be “spoiler free” and short and to the point.
xXx
Lets start the ball rolling with xXx. Hands down, xXx is FUN. This movie is one hell of a roller coaster ride that’ll leave everyone smiling the whole way through, whether it’s the AMAZING action sequences or the hilarious “Anold” style one-liners (kudos to Vin for realizing that it’s between him and the Rock to take Arnolds thrown, and delivering some of the flattest, yet most quotable lines of the year). Now keep in mind this film is not any achievement in cinema, nor does it do anything to further the spy genre, or make any kind of artistic impact on the world. IT'S NOT SUPPOSED TO! If you go into this movie for the pure thrill of enjoying the ride you will. The movie doesn’t take itself seriously, and neither should the audience.
Vin Diesel plays Xander “xXx” Cage an extreme sport junkie who puts out underground movies of himself making vigilante style “political statements”. Eventually Xander’s infamy catches up with him though, and he’s given a choice between serving his government in the role of an undercover (expendable) spy, or serving his time in jail.
Samuel L. Jackson plays the government agent responsible for training and recruiting Xander, and not only lends his usual acting chops to an otherwise flatly acted film, but adds a sort of brilliant comic relief that only Samuel L. can. The scenes in which Samuel “tests” Vin are truly some of the most memorable action sequences you will ever see, and it’ll be hard for anyone not to grin with pleasure watching them play out.
As stated - the movie itself does nothing to redefine the spy genre. It follows the James Bond formula so closely that it’s already been spoofed by Austin Powers (think spy with girl on beach while headquarters is phoning in future missions on the machine saying “I know you’re listening” as the spy turns the power off for some other type of action). What it does do though (and does extremely well – X-treme – no pun intended) is raise the bar on action to a degree you can’t even imagine. The sequences of Xander skydiving, motor biking, snowboarding and driving put Mr. Bond to shame. It’s everything you’ve always wanted to see Bond do, but probably wouldn’t believe he could if he did. When Vin does it you believe.
All in all, this film is worth every penny of admission. It is a true summer blockbuster with franchise potential to make Bond drink a double vodka martini as he whines to his bartender about job security. Once people see this, they’re going to want more. Just don’t go in expecting to see an Oscar caliber film – go in to have fun, and that’s exactly what you’ll get in return.
BLUE CRUSH
The next film is Blue Crush. Blue Crush is one of those films you have to ask yourself “why?” “how?” and “who?”. Why did Universal make this film? How did they get Brian Grazer to produce it? And who is the audience for this movie?
The basic premise for this film is that young surfing star Anna Marie (played nicely by Kate Bosworth) is overcoming her fears from a near fatal surfing accident to prove she is one of the best surfers in the world by competing in the Pipeline Surfing competition. Along the way to accomplishing this she falls in love with a Jock (or as Turtle would say a "Hawly so Hawly he’s a Barny") visiting the island on vacation, and raising her younger sister, in her parents absence.
Unfortunately for the audience this movie is missing Stitch - a little monster who could destroy everything in this film, and leave us all cheering for more.
This film is weighted down with ridiculous flashbacks, messages, and speeches that seem to repeat themselves a hundred times over from the moment the film starts until the anticlimactic ending leaves you making side-cracks to your friends, or waking up wondering where you are. It starts strong pulling you in, then instead of crushing you, basically fizzles away.
This film is hard for me to even put into words for the simple fact that you won’t love it or hate it - you’ll just wonder what the point was. At least older surf movies like North Shore didn’t try and force any kind of social commentary down your throat, they were just fun surf movies loaded with action and dialogue that people still quote at parties (you took his stuff – you pound him).
Blue Crush takes itself way to seriously. No one cares about this girl’s problems and they play out as ridiculous obvious attempts at character development. I thought going into it that I’d at least see some amazing action and unbelievable surf sequences (considering Universals marketing department is comparing it to “The Fast and the Furious”). WRONG. Though there are some cool under water shots, this movie is fairly boring. The trailer makes it look like you’re going to see amazing car chases and non-stop fun, while the one car sequence lasts all of 2 seconds and the CGI matting of Anna Marie surfing Pipeline at the end is one of the most laughable effects I’ve seen in awhile.
OK – I need to stop – this is one where the rambling displeasure could flow for years. In conclusion, save this one for next July 4th when USA plays a surf movie marathon. It’s too cool for Brittany Spears fans not cool enough for real Surf Girls, and the chicks just aren’t hot enough to bring in guys over the age of 10 (and since the movies pg-13 I guess everyone’s shit out of luck).
POOLHALL JUNKIES
Finally comes the gem - that diamond in the ruff of independent films that I can only pray doesn’t go under the general publics radar this fall. One of those movies that’s so F-ing cool, you want to quit your job and become a con man, grifter, and hustler all at once (I realize all these adjectives lead up to the same thing, but it’s THAT COOL!). For anyone that loved the Sting, looked up to Fast Eddie Felson, and still managed to enjoy Rounders (with all its problems) - THIS FILMS FOR YOU! For everyone who understands what cool is – THIS FILMS FOR YOU! For anyone who wants to know what cool is – THEN THIS FILM IS REALLY FOR YOU! I enjoyed watching this film so much that I found myself not only smiling the whole way through, but wanting to talk it about for hours afterwards to everyone I saw.
The basic premise of this film is that a pool playing phenomenon kid (actor/writer/director and man to watch Mars Callahan) is steered away from a legitimate Pool career into a life of pool hall hustles and scams by his mentor (played brilliantly by Chaz Palmintari – by far his best stuff since the Usual Suspects). Years of hustles come and go until one day the kid, now a man, finds out that he could have gone pro, had he not been kept down by the man he trusted the most.
Now coming into this film, and watching the initial premise unfold, I couldn’t help thinking “I’ve seen this all before”. BUT I WAS WRONG! The hustles are original, the trick pool shots are amazing, the dialogue is beyond witty and the characters are not the stereotypical caricatures you’d expect them to be. The thing that stood out the most to me is the fact that the hero of the film is NOT the lovable loser we’ve all come to expect from films like this – he’s a winner, with enough balls and confidence to carry this film from start to finish. One of the best (and quietest) scenes in this film is one where his girlfriend (played solidly by Clint’s daughter Allison Eastwood) thinks he forgot her birthday because he was hustling. It’s one of those scenes where the girlfriend says, “that’s obviously more important than me” bullshit we get in all these films. However, it’s in this scene that we realize this guy is good, he might love the thrill ! of the game, but he’s anything but the kind of loser we’ve seen played out so many times in these films before.
Finally – though I promised short spoiler free reviews – it’s impossible to even think about this film without mentioning the great Walken. Though Walkens role as Alison Eastwood’s uncle is brief, it is POWERFUL. WOW, WOW, and WOW! To anyone who ever loved Walken, and wondered how he’s been making these straight to video crap films, this is the role you’ve been waiting for! His delivery and timing is perfect – and he was born to speak this characters dialogue. Walken completely steals the last scene of this film, to the point where your mouth is going to hurt from smiling so big.
Hat’s off to Mars – Not since Aronafsky hit the independent circuit has a filmmaker exploded onto the scene with such an easy to enjoy COOL ASS MOVIE as this. I can’t wait to see what he’s got in store next.
Now that he's re-invented the hustler movie, maybe he’ll re-invent the foul-mouthed kid flicks of the late seventies that the world so desperately could use (ah to hear the crowd at this years MLB ASG chant “LET THEM PLAY”) – but that’s ramblings for another time…
For now…call me Brewster Baker
