DeForest Kelley... One of my favorite beings is gone

Earlier today I forwarded Glen the news that DeForest Kelley had passed on. It felt like an email. Just another of those thousands of emails I've forwarded before.

I went on with my day. I watched my DVD of Jet Li and Tsui Hark's ONCE UPON A TIME IN CHINA PART II... I went to the Alamo Drafthouse and watched FERRIS BUELLER'S DAY OFF... and I came home wanting to go to sleep because at 10am Saturday I see Disney's TARZAN. I should be asleep right now. But I'm not.

Instead, I'm here in this damn room of mine thinking of a man I grew up with. And yes I mean that in a literal sense. I have never really made a statement about where I am on Star Trek, but I do dearly love it. Every bit as much as I do Star Wars. For some that is sacrilege, but for me, it is simply the truth. Before I knew what a Star Wars was, I had seen all the Classic Treks.

Before my Han Solo Blaster toy, I had my Phaser with the light bulb front that I could slide a round disc in that would have a cut out of the Enterprise, a Romulan Warbird and a Klingon Bird of Prey, as a chirping electronic noise racked over my parent's ears.

Before Yoda taught me to keep my mind on where I was, and what I was a doing... I listened to Spock argue LOGIC, while Bones went on about the beauty of the human spirit. And... for all of Spock's trying, I always felt that McCoy was right.

DeForest's passion swelled up inside of me. When Spock gave Kirk the 'Vulcan Death Grip' and Bones exploded at him... Well, I wanted to choke the green blooded bastard.

Kelley taught me through his arguments on Star Trek, that being human was the most precious thing we have. The ability to feel, to love, to yearn, to cheer... these abilities he held and cherished. Not only that, but he wanted to teach those loves to Spock. He yearned for him to understand. And in his attempt... He taught me.

Now, he's gone. And I've already seen the talk backs that say, "I'm Dead Jim" but... when I say it aloud... I hear Kelley's unmistakable voice, I hear it tremble... I see a twitch in his left eye.. and I cry.

I remember the one thing that first made The Next Generation series... a Star Trek series was that moment in ENCOUNTER AT FARPOINT where Data and the incredibly ancient Leonard McCoy are walking together and... Ya know.. It killed me. Right there. That moment. It was DeForrest Kelley that they chose to represent the past... to bridge the two series... And they could not have chosen better.

That man is and always shall be my friend. He has been with me since memory. I've had buttons, patches, stills and so many memories that he was a part of. I remember watching him in Penny Arcade machines at the earliest of Fan Conventions. I remember meeting him as a small boy at a Houston Con when Bjo Trimble had him as a guest. I remember shaking his hand and smiling huge. I remember laughing as he came aboard the New Enterprise in STAR TREK THE MOTION PICTURE with that beard and that white jumper.

I think the reason I loved his character so much is that he really reminded me of Dad... But my Dad in space. Always arguing with the same passion.

I miss him. He is still so alive in my memory. Death and aging suck.

I had to get this out of me before I could even attempt to close my eyes. I had to talk about this with you. It's my therapy. It's really cheap.

DeForest Kelley is dead, but as long as I'm alive he's right there... He's my Jiminy Cricket... my conscience. The one that argues right and wrong with me. He's not the only one, but he's the most convincing.

That's all I can say right now, I don't know if any of it makes a bit of sense, I wrote this more for myself than for anything else. Bye.